Yes, you are correct, Calm People have moved in to film recommendations now. Is there any limit to our ambition and vanity? No is the honest answer but let’s not go into that now.
At Christmas, there is nothing our family like more than simply relaxing, being together and watching films. I don’t think we are that unique and my experience is many others like doing the same. That combination of cold outside temperatures, the warmth inside and the family choosing to together mean watching a film, cosied up, is a really attractive proposition.
Of course, there can be the endless debate….what to watch?
Well, I thought I would make a bold attempt to circumvent the trial of deciding who chooses the movie with a recommendation.
No, it is not the latest Star Wars movie, The Last Jedi or the enjoyable The Lego Batman Movie. Nor is it Dunkirk, Logan or Despicable Me 3 all of which are enjoyable in different ways.
Typically for me, I’ll be recommending a movie that delivers on storyline, jokes, heartwarming moments and emotional education. I am of course talking about the brilliant Pixar movie Inside Out.
This is the beautifully crafted tale of what is going on inside the head of Riley, a hockey-loving teenager, as her parents move to Los Angeles as told by the group of emotions she has (and we all have) going on inside her head.
It’s a great story. It’s brilliantly told and it has some great lines including one uttered by Bing Bong (Riley’s imaginary friend). In the chaos of one scene Happiness in her excitement knocks over a box of opinions and a box of facts. As she tries to divide them up she says “oh no, these facts and opinions all look so similar…” and Bing Bong replies “Don’t worry that happens all the time” as he scoops them up, mixing them up together and dumps them to one side.
That’s just one of my laugh out loud moments that have been known to embarrass my teenage daughters when I take the family to the cinema.
Now the serious bit…So why this movie?
Not only will every age enjoy the story and the dialogue but it has a really serious mental health message put over so subtly that some will miss it.
What’s the message?….It is this
Our feelings, all of them, are valid and essential for us to experience ourselves as healthy fully functioning humans.
Yes, it is ok and normal to feel angry or sad or hurt. We all experience shame (disgust) and we all experience happiness.
Unfortunately, our experience at Calm People is that many, many adults are not fully acknowledging their feelings or allowing them the healthy space they deserve. Subsequently they will open themselves up to a greater exposure to mental health challenges such as stress (fear), anxiety (background constant fear) and depression (sadness plus more). These become more intense because we ignore or suppress feelings that cause us to feel vulnerable.
Not allowing yourself the full range of your feelings will give you a greater chance of suffering mental health challenges
A very wise man Bill Spinoza says “What you can’t be with, will not let you be.” This absolutely applies to our full range of feelings.
Adults note: Children are better at this than we are but guess what?…because of our role modelling they develop the same unhealthy habits around feelings that we have. It is, therefore, our fundamental purpose to role model healthy feelings to our children and it is never too late to start.
I hope you enjoy the film and if you are left by this wondering…..so what do I do with my feelings you could try one of the steps below.
If you want to understand more about your feelings e-mail firstname.lastname@example.org or call 01332 869211 and ask for Julian
Or read this blog on Journaling we published a few months ago